All right. I have a dinosaur computer lurking in my closet. I've been keeping it with the thought that someday, when I finally get a teaching job again, I can put it in my classroom for students to work on or something. A while back I decided to go ahead and get all the stuff off of it and put it on one of my newer machines. It runs Win 95, so I went online to find kludged together USB drive drivers for it, since apparently those weren't made for the '95 OS. (Remember that I speak as a sycophant, admiring the technorati but not being one) I finally found it, reassembled the dinosaur (age, not size), and got all set to go to work.

Then I saw that my old computer has no USB ports. Fuck.
Nor does it have a CD burner. It does have a 3.5" drive, but even though the hard drive is a teensy 2 gigs, the thought of transferring that at 1.4 meg a round was daunting. Or at least boring. Here is my plea for advice or guidance:
If I took one of those, um, the cords with the plugs that look like big telephone jacks (firewire?) and stuck one end in the dinosaur and the other in one of my new(er) computers, would the following process of transferring files from the old to the new(er) be self-explanatory? Would a wizard pop up and say, "Hello. It looks like you're trying to transfer files from one computer to another. Would you like help?" I hope this is the case, but that really sounds way too much like something that would happen on a Mac and not a PC, which is what I'm dealing with.

Am I right? How easy a thing is it to do? Will I have to do things like align IP addresses and type things involving characters that by rights should be punctuation marks but are instead secret signals in this strange wizardly computer tongue?

If it matters, the other computers (either one) are running XP sp3. Is there any other hardware setup that is pertinent?